HELP!!! - Midlife crisis
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HELP!!! - Midlife crisis
OK guys: I'm going to get all whiney and personal with you but I need some ideas. I'm going to be 50 in January (big YUC!!!) and have been thinking about my future a lot lately. I have been working in the Oil Industry for over 25 years now and do not want to work at it for another 25 years. I have been working in glass for the same amount of time (just traditional stained glass) and have been fusing for over 2. I would love to be able to get out of the "Great White North" and end up some where being creative in a warm place. How do I plan this??? I don't want to be a starving artist but a happy artist. Do I just continue working 40 hours and trying to fit my glass in whenever or do I start working shorter work weeks and working on my glass more?? Do I try to get into a business where art is involved or will that take up too much of my time?? Do I go take a bunch of time off work and try going to an art school?? Is there a place in North America where I could take a sabatical and find out what I need to do?? So the big question is: If you were me - how would you plan your future??? I had a dream last night - that I got stuck in Santa Fe with no way to go home and had to stay and survive. After I got over the shock (in my dream), I was actually happy to be forced into it. So you probably have any idea of my problem - any suggestions???
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It takes a while to get established. First figure out your monthly expenses and then figure out what you can cut. Earn your base amount that you absolutely need to survive and buy equipment etc. from a regular job and then do nothing else in your spare time than try to perfect your glass and make it saleable and start selling enough to quit the job. I am sure others will have more ideas. The one drag of being an artist is that you have no pension/thus can never quit working.
20 years ago I left Sudbury Ontario and moved to Oahu. 40 below for 20 years is enough to age anyone. I had 2K in my pocket and worked a bunch of different jobs. My dad had tought me stained glass when I was 14. I purchased a small shop years ago and have never been back.
It's different for everyone. At that time in my life I owned nothing and had nothing to lose. Ten years from now I dought I could make the same moves I did then.
It is much easier to pickup where others have left off than it is to make a name for yourself. I would advise finding a shop in the area you want to live and buy them out. I put up with a lot of crap for a while from some pissed off customers of the former owner - but it all went away after they figured out I was the new guy and did things my way.
I don't say "A" any more but people still pick me off as a Canadian by "out and about"
It's different for everyone. At that time in my life I owned nothing and had nothing to lose. Ten years from now I dought I could make the same moves I did then.
It is much easier to pickup where others have left off than it is to make a name for yourself. I would advise finding a shop in the area you want to live and buy them out. I put up with a lot of crap for a while from some pissed off customers of the former owner - but it all went away after they figured out I was the new guy and did things my way.
I don't say "A" any more but people still pick me off as a Canadian by "out and about"

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My recommendation would be to schedule an appointment with your financial advisor. Don't have one, you say? This might be a good time to find one. She could look over your current financial situation, your investments, etc. and help you figure out a plan to get where you want to be. Knowing where you want to be is half the problem.
~ Joanne
"What neglected medication made you think THAT was a good idea??"
- me, to myself
"What neglected medication made you think THAT was a good idea??"
- me, to myself
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Great ideas - I have thought about a financial advisor. Lionel - how did you get around being a Canadian and working in the States??? Didn't they hassle you for wanting to buy a business in America??? Kevin and Lionel: do you find that having a business just in glass makes the glass not as enjoyable; ie, it's more like work than just being creative??? P.S. the west coast or Hawaii would work just fine for me!!!!! (I wish)
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Make the move! (I dream of warm places during winter~ )
You could work on a strong production line and market it anywhere. Or..what about moving to your warm destination-perhaps a place with a strong glass/art community-work at a stained glass store by day (part time of course) and work your glass during off hours. (or something like that...) If I was in your shoes, I think I would want some kind of art/glass job to, just to keep the roof over the head till glass income comes in~ Will there be a better time in your life to do something like this? I think it would be exciting and a bit hard..but also a rewarding experience in the end.
Sarah
You could work on a strong production line and market it anywhere. Or..what about moving to your warm destination-perhaps a place with a strong glass/art community-work at a stained glass store by day (part time of course) and work your glass during off hours. (or something like that...) If I was in your shoes, I think I would want some kind of art/glass job to, just to keep the roof over the head till glass income comes in~ Will there be a better time in your life to do something like this? I think it would be exciting and a bit hard..but also a rewarding experience in the end.
Sarah
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Kathie-20 years ago I was in a job that paid well, had good benefits, and was secure. I quit it to open my glass studio. The first five years were difficult, and come to think of it so have the remaining 15 been too, but I love what I do, can make a living from it, and would not have any other job. For me it came down to taking the plunge. I waffled for a while, waiting for the "right" time, but it never seemed to jell. Finally I decided that the right time was now, and did it. Guess I have known about a half dozen people, my father included, who worked years at a job they either barely tolerated, or actively loathed, only to retire and die a few years later. That example inclined me to do what I love, and to accept the travails of a creative profession as a price I am happy to pay. There are so many ways to the practical steps of doing glass for a living, and I'll leave that to the other posters. I'll just offer my spiritual encouragement to take those first scary steps.
Kathie,
First off the decade of the 50s is fabulous no yucks here . . . in fact next year I hit the next decade and am looking forward to it as well. It's taken us a long time to get to these milestones so enjoy!
I've had my glass business since 1991 and never looked back. Exciting, scary and rewarding times. In 1994 my husband left his engineering job to work full time with me. We love it. Only thing I'd suggest is to be as close to debt free as you can, which will allow you the ebb and flow of our crazy economy and vagaries of life. It's not easy although it can certainly be rewarding.
The craft show circuit is sluggish right now I've been told. Find a venue that resonates with you. I've not found financial advisors who understand the pulse of the artistic soul. The book I always recommend is by Sanaya Roman "Creating Money: Keys to Abundance" truly helps put your life and dreams to perspective.
Good luck and happy birthday,
Sara
First off the decade of the 50s is fabulous no yucks here . . . in fact next year I hit the next decade and am looking forward to it as well. It's taken us a long time to get to these milestones so enjoy!
I've had my glass business since 1991 and never looked back. Exciting, scary and rewarding times. In 1994 my husband left his engineering job to work full time with me. We love it. Only thing I'd suggest is to be as close to debt free as you can, which will allow you the ebb and flow of our crazy economy and vagaries of life. It's not easy although it can certainly be rewarding.
The craft show circuit is sluggish right now I've been told. Find a venue that resonates with you. I've not found financial advisors who understand the pulse of the artistic soul. The book I always recommend is by Sanaya Roman "Creating Money: Keys to Abundance" truly helps put your life and dreams to perspective.
Good luck and happy birthday,
Sara
Kathie,
24 years ago I was making a really, really good living in a 9-5 job, had a "dream houe", an 1855 farm house completely remodeled, with 9 acres, 2 barns, tractor and lots of toys. My wife and I had 2 and 1/3 children at the time we made our "mid-life crisis" move (actually, it wasn't mid-life, but it had to suffice because neither of us could go through it again!
) We sold everything, I went to seminary, lived in a teeny tiny house with my family, my wife worked, and we never, ever looked back.
Sure we've had lots of fried bologna dinners, jelly only sandwiches and times of not enough, and I drive a 1988 Toyota, but through it all we have been very contented. And looking back I realize how much better our quality of life has been. My good friend got my job when I left AT&T, now makes over 250k a year, and is absolutely miserable.
I have read many of the replies, and the one thing I keep "hearing" in the posts is a statement I came across years ago: "no one said it would be easy, they said it would be worth it."
Happy 50th.
24 years ago I was making a really, really good living in a 9-5 job, had a "dream houe", an 1855 farm house completely remodeled, with 9 acres, 2 barns, tractor and lots of toys. My wife and I had 2 and 1/3 children at the time we made our "mid-life crisis" move (actually, it wasn't mid-life, but it had to suffice because neither of us could go through it again!

Sure we've had lots of fried bologna dinners, jelly only sandwiches and times of not enough, and I drive a 1988 Toyota, but through it all we have been very contented. And looking back I realize how much better our quality of life has been. My good friend got my job when I left AT&T, now makes over 250k a year, and is absolutely miserable.
I have read many of the replies, and the one thing I keep "hearing" in the posts is a statement I came across years ago: "no one said it would be easy, they said it would be worth it."
Happy 50th.

Chip
Micah 6.8
Kathie,
I have been pondering what you are talking about for quite some time and I am only 34
I have a great job making good money but, my heart is not here. I can only say that as I hopefully soon have the courage you might also. Fear is the great limiter for human kind. I truly believe if we can conquer our fear we can acomplish almost anything.
I can think of lots of profit centers from owning a glass based business.
Selling Supplies
Teaching Classes
Doing Comission work
Selling Shop time to people without equipment
Having an Online Ecommerce site
The list goes on and on.....
Go for it! Best Wish.... Paul
I have been pondering what you are talking about for quite some time and I am only 34

I can think of lots of profit centers from owning a glass based business.
Selling Supplies
Teaching Classes
Doing Comission work
Selling Shop time to people without equipment
Having an Online Ecommerce site
The list goes on and on.....
Go for it! Best Wish.... Paul
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Have to disagree with this one!!! We moved after 11 years in Minnesota with its very long cold winters out here to the Gulf Islands where the worst winter holds is some rain and temps in the low 40's for the most part. It was the third best decision I ever made in my life. There is a thriving artist community here, gorgeous inspirational scenery, lovely people, well obviously we LOVE it here--its changed my life enormously. Good luck--I hope it works out as well for you!Ontariodon wrote:The Grass always looks greener............... seldom is. I love working in a kiln warmed studio looking out at a bright, crisp, winter wonderland.eh!
Amy
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I have both US and Canadian passports thanks to mum - American and dad the Canadian. Can you spell Canerican. No regrets and yes I had the rice and pepper days. Investing in the US is an easy way to get a green card - they have a whole program for it.
Yes I miss the fall even to this day. My sisters in TO and folks up at the Big Nickel come visit and bring lots of Maple with them. A lot of years have passed since I last had a Sudbury Saturday night at the Colson - but they don't wear swim trunks 6 days a week or swim with sea turtles.
As to less fun as a job - I make art all day long and it makes others happy and they give me money - and that makes me happy - and I make more art----wow what a way to make the bacon.
Warm is good - Cold is good too - for a visit.
Yes I miss the fall even to this day. My sisters in TO and folks up at the Big Nickel come visit and bring lots of Maple with them. A lot of years have passed since I last had a Sudbury Saturday night at the Colson - but they don't wear swim trunks 6 days a week or swim with sea turtles.
As to less fun as a job - I make art all day long and it makes others happy and they give me money - and that makes me happy - and I make more art----wow what a way to make the bacon.
Warm is good - Cold is good too - for a visit.
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Happy-happy b-day, Kathie. Sara is right - 50 is a magnificent age! I eagerly look forward to the next 50 or more??? years of life (especially now that Lee press on/sew in body parts have been perfected- LOL!).
The great part about reaching this age is you can start working on your "little old lady crusty license" - can be anything, can say (or choose not to say....) anything, can do anything! Can definitely wear purple, dance with a rose in your mouth and wear a big red hat or not...........!!
Here's another life change affirmation...... My husband & I relocated (1 & 1/2 years ago) to life on the Mississippi River in the embrace of an artist community. This was after our youngest daughter left home to go out on her own. This type of arts relocation was our goal and intent for a good number of years.
One of the best parts of this relocation has been to join this like-minded group of supportive artists. There's an unspoken, invisible safety net, mutual understanding and constructive suggestion that is invaluable. All supportive of growth and forward momentum for the individual and for the group. When we don't know the answer to a question or are faced with a dilemma, there's help available from some part of this group.
Now, we are all a bunch of individualistic, independant thinkers - just goes with the job description - and we have rip-roaring differences of opinion on occasion. But where it counts and when it's needed we come together as an effective supportive team.
I highly recommend finding a community of like-minded (to your interests) people and participating in this community in some way. This can be joining/living/working within the group, participating part-time or simply regular networking. This interaction can make your transition easier. Also those who have experienced reaching similar goals can give you guidance and mentorship. You're right in posting this question here - WGBB is a great place to start this change process.
It's good to have some sort of safety net when you're trying a new way of walking/running/flying, because most days it's hard work, some days it's scarey, some days it's paradise & everyday it's worth it! We wouldn't change one iota of it!
Good luck - it is possible............
The great part about reaching this age is you can start working on your "little old lady crusty license" - can be anything, can say (or choose not to say....) anything, can do anything! Can definitely wear purple, dance with a rose in your mouth and wear a big red hat or not...........!!
Here's another life change affirmation...... My husband & I relocated (1 & 1/2 years ago) to life on the Mississippi River in the embrace of an artist community. This was after our youngest daughter left home to go out on her own. This type of arts relocation was our goal and intent for a good number of years.
One of the best parts of this relocation has been to join this like-minded group of supportive artists. There's an unspoken, invisible safety net, mutual understanding and constructive suggestion that is invaluable. All supportive of growth and forward momentum for the individual and for the group. When we don't know the answer to a question or are faced with a dilemma, there's help available from some part of this group.
Now, we are all a bunch of individualistic, independant thinkers - just goes with the job description - and we have rip-roaring differences of opinion on occasion. But where it counts and when it's needed we come together as an effective supportive team.
I highly recommend finding a community of like-minded (to your interests) people and participating in this community in some way. This can be joining/living/working within the group, participating part-time or simply regular networking. This interaction can make your transition easier. Also those who have experienced reaching similar goals can give you guidance and mentorship. You're right in posting this question here - WGBB is a great place to start this change process.
It's good to have some sort of safety net when you're trying a new way of walking/running/flying, because most days it's hard work, some days it's scarey, some days it's paradise & everyday it's worth it! We wouldn't change one iota of it!
Good luck - it is possible............
Well I'll tackle the Art school part. Yes I'm 42 and yes I just dumped my biz (etc) to go to Grad school, but here's my 3 months in take.
If you want to go into bizness, or if you want to learn more about your technique, Spend your Art school money on Workshops. I will spend approx 30K on my MFA. If you can spend that on workshops, you will get much more practical info than I will for the $$$.
No I'm not disappointed, or surprised, but it will be a fight to get what I want from the MFA program. They want me to explore, challenge, and stretch. GOOD things. But there will (as far as I can see) be no practical education. Just theory. GOOD stuff. If that is the direction you want to go.
Greg
If you want to go into bizness, or if you want to learn more about your technique, Spend your Art school money on Workshops. I will spend approx 30K on my MFA. If you can spend that on workshops, you will get much more practical info than I will for the $$$.
No I'm not disappointed, or surprised, but it will be a fight to get what I want from the MFA program. They want me to explore, challenge, and stretch. GOOD things. But there will (as far as I can see) be no practical education. Just theory. GOOD stuff. If that is the direction you want to go.
Greg
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It was 2 1/2 years ago for me that I left my lucrative job in advertising to become a glass artist and jewelry designer. I altered my life to accomodate the smaller income. I rent out a room in my 2 bedroom Manhattan apt.. I no longer get to enjoy some of the best restaurants in the world and I haven't seen a Broadway show in that same amount of time. I volunteer for a Film Society, so I see all my movies for free and I volunteer at my local jewelry studio for free benchtime. And if someone said to me you have to go back to advertising, I fear I might become violent. The last piece of business I managed was for one of the largest wireless telephony accounts (hint: begins with a "V" and I'm not responsible for "Can you hear me now?" I swear.). My group put out about 48,000 print ads a year and countless TV commercials. I lived in a perpetual state of agitation and angst. My clients were relentless and sometimes downright vicious. Sometimes before going to work, I would have a panic attack and would have to be talked down by a friend. I was comletely freaked out all the time and at one point I was actually losing my hair.
I'm a completely different person now with a beautiful head of long-curly hair (I gave up getting haircuts too). I am less tense and anxious. I love what I do. I work harder than I ever did, but I feel so fulfilled. Sometimes I think I'm actually happy. (But being a typical New Yorker, I know better.)
I too contemplated art school, but then again I always thought of anything past a BA as procrastination. I hardly learned anything in university that I used in the real world. Why should I start now? Plus, I feel completely unfettered by knowledge. Artistically, I have know clue as to what is right and what is wrong, so I just do what I like and hope it sells. I learn everything by doing, taking workshops, reading books and especially reading this board.
With regard to finance. I took a look at my monthly and yearly expenses, cut what could be cut (taxis, MAJOR expense). I put aside enough money for 1 year and I'm just coming to the end at the 2 1/2 year mark. (It's amazing how much money you don't spend, when you're not wearing a suit and expensive shoes.) And even though I'm a little scared, I feel confident that everything will work out because I completely love what I do and I am proud of what I produce.
Wow, that was very cathartic. Thank you!
Good luck!!!!!!!
Melissa
I'm a completely different person now with a beautiful head of long-curly hair (I gave up getting haircuts too). I am less tense and anxious. I love what I do. I work harder than I ever did, but I feel so fulfilled. Sometimes I think I'm actually happy. (But being a typical New Yorker, I know better.)
I too contemplated art school, but then again I always thought of anything past a BA as procrastination. I hardly learned anything in university that I used in the real world. Why should I start now? Plus, I feel completely unfettered by knowledge. Artistically, I have know clue as to what is right and what is wrong, so I just do what I like and hope it sells. I learn everything by doing, taking workshops, reading books and especially reading this board.
With regard to finance. I took a look at my monthly and yearly expenses, cut what could be cut (taxis, MAJOR expense). I put aside enough money for 1 year and I'm just coming to the end at the 2 1/2 year mark. (It's amazing how much money you don't spend, when you're not wearing a suit and expensive shoes.) And even though I'm a little scared, I feel confident that everything will work out because I completely love what I do and I am proud of what I produce.
Wow, that was very cathartic. Thank you!
Good luck!!!!!!!
Melissa
Melissa Terman
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For Father's Day this year I bought my husband a copy of the movie "Office Space." I suggest you rent that or even buy it if ever, EVER you feel like going back to cubicle land!Melissa Terman wrote:And if someone said to me you have to go back to advertising, I fear I might become violent.
My husband's midlife crisis was to quit working as an engineer at a defense contractor and re-hab old houses for a living. He thanked me profusely for the gift and said that it convinced him he'd made the right decision. He watches it every once in a while if he's having a bad self-employed day. It makes it all better.
Now if *I* could just leave cubicle land...(Health benes for a family of 5?! Who needs 'em!)
- Bev
Bev Brandt